the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Just invented taco cereal.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
