she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
