I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Randomize
