is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
You smell like stripper and shame
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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