I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
