so that wasnt chicken after all
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
