There is no way he is gay with that hair.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
