I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Randomize
