did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
