her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
