So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize