This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize
