Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
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