All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
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