we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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