At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
don't judge my taste in strippers
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
