Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
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