think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
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