I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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