Midget sex pt 2 tonight
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
