Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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