# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
you made out with another girl for some wings
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
