Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
So vagazzling was a success
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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