So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
