If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
You had me at "let me see your balls"
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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