i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Randomize
