haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Randomize
