Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I need a burrito and a hug.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
