VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
