Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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