We won't sleep together?
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
