bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
