are you so shy because you have an std?
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
