i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
