People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
