I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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