Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
