She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
