I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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