Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
And my parents said I crawled through the house
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
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