Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
