Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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