my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I'm like, not good at living.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
