I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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