Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
