wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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