the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
