Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Randomize
