Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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