My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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