I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Randomize
