Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Randomize
