Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Randomize
